The holidays are a time when we are supposed to feel joyful and grateful. But for many of us, they are a time when we feel anything but. We may be grieving the loss of a loved one or struggling to cope with a major life change. Our once-cherished traditions and festivities can become a reminder of everything we have lost, leaving us wondering how we will make it through. And the season's stress can make it even hard to focus and cope with our emotions.

When it seems like everyone is connecting with others, and you're the only one losing touch, you aren't alone. When you see all the surrounding joy, but all you feel is pain, there is hope. 

Here are a few tips and reminders for coping with grief over the holidays: 

Allow yourself the time and space you need to work through your grief. 

The first step is understanding that grief is a natural response to loss and can manifest itself in many ways. It is important to permit yourself to grieve in whatever way feels right for you, starting with acknowledging your feelings.

It's okay to feel sad, angry, scared, or alone when dealing with grief – holidays or not. When the pressure to feel better for the holiday's sake creeps in, permit yourself to mourn at your own pace. Don't try to speed up the healing process or put on a brave face for everyone else. There is no timeline for healing.

Be realistic and gentle with yourself.

Once you have acknowledged your grief, it is important to plan how to cope with it during the holidays. This may involve setting aside time each day for yourself or your hobbies, avoiding certain holiday activities that are too painful, or sharing memories and spending time with supportive family and friends.

Above all, be realistic about your expectations and not put too much pressure on yourself. The holidays will be hard, but taking things one day at a time will help you get through it.

Find ways to celebrate the holidays that are meaningful for you.

Learning to cope with grief during the holidays is integral to the healing process, and it helps to find ways to make the holiday season special in your own way.

No matter what type of loss you are facing, you may find solace in refocusing your holiday celebrations that honor your current situation or the memories of a loved one. For some people, continuing familiar traditions can be a source of comfort. Others may find that they need to find entirely new ways to celebrate or spend the holidays.

Whatever you do, be intentional as you find ways to make the holiday season meaningful for you and your family.

Seek the help of a grief counselor. 

No matter the time of year, remember that you are not alone in your grief and that help is available. Grief counseling can provide support and guidance as you navigate your journey through grief.

I specialize in helping people cope with loss, and I would be honored to listen to your story and support you in every step. Together, we can create a plan to help you heal through the holidays and open up to the possibility of experiencing joy again.